Beyond Advice: The One Prayer Your Friends Truly Need

Dr. Spencer R. Fusselman

When someone we love is hurting, our first instinct is to fix it. A friend loses their job, and we rush in with career advice and job boards. A couple is struggling, and we offer relationship books and our own two cents. A loved one faces a scary diagnosis, and we scour the internet for treatments and second opinions. We offer advice, solutions, and worldly wisdom because we want to help. But what if the most powerful thing we could do is pray for something else entirely? What if the one thing they truly need—the only thing that will bring a real and long-lasting solution—is not a change in circumstance, but an impartation of divine wisdom?

The Shifting Sands of Worldly Wisdom

We live in a world drowning in information but starved for truth. The wisdom of the world is loud, appealing, and available with a single click. It tells us to follow our hearts, hustle harder, and build our lives on principles that change with the cultural tides. Even our most established human knowledge is constantly being revised. For decades, science held one "truth" about human history in the Americas, only for recent discoveries in New Mexico to completely overturn it, proving that what was considered fact was just a temporary placeholder for a deeper reality.

Mankind, with all our progress, simply cannot get it right permanently. The advice that works today is outdated tomorrow. This is the shifting sand we’re told to build our lives on. But God offers something unshakably firm.

The Ancient Foundation of True Wisdom

Long before our modern struggles, Scripture laid a foundation for a wisdom that does not fade. The psalmist declared its power and perfection:

“The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul;
The testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple;
The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart;
The commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes;”
- Psalm 19:7-8

Notice the effects of this wisdom: it revives the soul, secures the mind, brings joy to the heart, and enlightens the eyes. It’s not just a collection of facts; it is a transformative force. So, where does it begin? How do we access it?

“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom,
And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”
- Proverbs 9:10

True wisdom doesn't start with gathering information; it starts with our posture before God. It begins with a reverential awe and a humble submission to the one who is the source of all truth. It’s acknowledging that He knows, and we need Him to reveal it to us.

The Apostle’s Prayer: Our Model for Intercession

This ancient truth is precisely what the Apostle Paul modeled when he prayed for his friends in Ephesus. Notice, upon hearing of their faith, he didn’t just pray for their health, wealth, or comfort. He prayed for something infinitely more valuable:

“...I do not cease to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers: that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened…”
- Ephesians 1:16-18

This should stop us in our tracks. Paul’s number one prayer request for believers was for them to receive divine wisdom. Why? Because he knew that if they had God’s perspective, they could navigate any hardship. If the eyes of their understanding were truly enlightened, they would see their problems through the lens of God's eternal power, not their temporary pain. He knew no worldly advice or quick fix could ever compare to the soul-anchoring stability of seeing things as God sees them.

When we pray for this wisdom for our fellow Christians, we are asking God to give them:

• An Eternal Perspective: To see beyond the immediate crisis to the "hope of His calling."
• A Renewed Mind: To stop being conformed to the world’s panicked responses and instead be transformed by a heavenly viewpoint (Romans 12:2).
• True Discernment: To distinguish between the world’s fleeting solutions and God’s perfect, acceptable will.

This is the only wisdom that brings real and lasting solutions because it addresses the root of our struggles—not just our circumstances, but the state of our hearts and minds within those circumstances.

So next time a friend comes to you with a hardship, by all means, be there for them. But before you offer a flood of worldly advice, stop and pray the most powerful prayer you can: that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ would give them the spirit of wisdom and revelation. Pray for their eyes to be enlightened. You’re not just praying for them to feel better; you’re praying for them to be anchored to the only One who can see them through.